Saturday, November 30, 2024

From the Archives: Who is to blame for prejudice? Let's start with the victims!

Editors' Note:  Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!  When we were put on the spot and asked to list what we were grateful for as the flaming dumpster fire that is 2024 burns what was left of American democracy to cinders, we admit we had to think about it.  We decided that we were grateful for a few things: we haven't lost our marbles, our racist brother in Annandale hasn't taken over our columns, our billions in ill-gotten gains and squads of vicious high-priced lawyers render our publishing empire impervious to pressure from the New Regime, and to pad our pages we can always dip into our 254 years of archives.

Speaking of those archives, among the leading ridiculous narratives being pushed these days is that the wave of anti-trans bigotry fomented by the Tangerine-Faced Fascist and his legions of taint polishers is the fault of those who oppose that bigotry.  We wondered if there were any examples of such victim-blaming that we could find in our pages, especially during the days when we relied more heavily on third-party news sources.  And guess what: we found some!

December 16, 1933

By Charles Lindbergh
Chicago Tribune News Service

To get on the wrong side of Jewish activists is often to endure their unsparing criticism, whether in America or Germany.

After a Democratic congressman defended parents who expressed concern about Jewish athletes competing against their young Christian daughters, a local party official and ally compared him to a Nazi “cooperator” and a group called “Neighbors Against Hate” organized a protest outside his office.

When Martin Heidegger said that denying any relationship between race and biology was “deeply misogynistic and regressive,” a prominent Jewish lobby accused him of betraying “real science.” A few angry critics posted photos of themselves burning his books before patriotic German students at the University of Freiburg showed them how to run a book bonfire.

When the new Hitler Government convened a call with Jewish groups to discuss new limits on the participation of Jew students in university life, one powerful Jewish banker/activist fumed that the administration would be complicit in “genocide” of Jews.

Now, some Jewish activists say it is time to rethink and recalibrate their confrontational ways, and are pushing back against the more all-or-nothing voices in their coalition.

“We have to make it OK for someone to change their minds,” said Lessing Rosenwald, executive director of Advocates for Jewish Equality. “We cannot vilify them for not being on our side. No one wants to join that team.”

Efforts by Jewish activists to protest alleged Nazis backfired

Mr. Rosenwald, who grew up in a prominent Jewish family in Illinois, said that as painful as Herr Hitler’s election may be for the Hebrew Race, they should see the benefit in treating skeptics less like enemies and more like future allies.

“No Gentile wants to feel stupid or condescended to,” Mr. Rosenwald said.

The public does not appear to be growing more empathetic to the Jewish cause. Fewer Americans today than two years ago say they support some of the rights that Jewish activists have pushed for, like allowing children to apply to universities without regard to their religion.  And multiple recent polls have found that a considerable majority of Americans and German believe advocacy for Jewish rights has gone “too far.”

Other prominent Jews like Robert Lehman said too many activists today are distracted by counterproductive debates — boycotting Hearst Newspapers for example, and insisting that there are no reasonable objections to allowing Jews into their cooperative apartments and medical specialties.

Mr. Lehman noted that Jewish activists lost credibility with many Americans once they started accusing people of bigotry over restricited suburbs.

“We looked unreasonable,” she said. “We should be talking about the 7-year-old Jewess who just wants to play soccer with her friends.”

September 15, 1964

by Jessie Helms
Beloved WRAL-TV anchor via North Carolina Newspaper Alliance

The North Carolina State University women’s volleyball team, which is at the center of a national debate over the inclusion of Negroes in college sports, advanced to its conference championship on Saturday without having played a single game in the tournament.

After a first-round bye, the team was preparing to play a semifinal match in the Appalachian Conference tournament scheduled for Friday, but the opposing team — South Carolina University — refused for the third time to play the Rebels because of their Negro player.

After NCSU beat Winston-Salem State University on Wednesday to qualify for the semifinal in Wilmington, the players celebrated by cheering and hugging. They talked quietly in a huddle, then cheered again.

Hours later the NCSU Rebels released a statement that read: “The decision to not continue to play in the  tournament was not an easy one. Our team overcame forfeitures to earn a spot in the tournament field and fought for the win over Winston-Salem in the first round on Wednesday. They should not have to forgo this opportunity while waiting for a more thoughtful and better system that serves all athletes.”

Protesters tried to keep a Negro player from competing

It was the seventh time this year that an Appalachian Conference team has backed out of a match against NCSU out of protest over the Negro player, who declined an interview request through a university spokeswoman. South Carolina, one of five teams to forfeit games against the Rebels this season, also forfeited two regular season games against them.

The university has not confirmed that the player is Negro (some claim that she is a mulatto or even a quadroon). But her involvement with the team prompted a teammate and her assistant coach to file a lawsuit earlier this month, trying to keep her from playing in the tournament — and also on white teams at all.

The Negro player’s affiliation with NCSU was published by a conservative website in April, surprising some of her teammates and opposing teams. And in the days and weeks to follow, the Rebels were struggling to find ways to comprehend the information as politicians addressed it in their campaigns. Negroes are allowed to compete in N.C.A.A. volleyball, even though their brute strength, caused by centuries of selective breeding of slaves, may exceed that of the white student athletes. 

In public forums, Senator Strom Thurmond and other conservative candidates vowed to find ways to bar athletes who were not classified as white at birth from college sports. Sen. Thurmond called the situation “so crazy.”

Marcia Blackburn, a senior player, and Virginia Cox, the assistant coach, along with 10 other white volleyball players, were the ones to sue thet Conference and its commissioner, the Rebels’ head coach and others involved with the university.

But a federal judge denied their request on Monday to bar the Negro player, clearing her to play, and on Tuesday another judge rejected the plaintiffs’ appeal, too.

Reaching the final without having played a game was exactly what Ms. Blackburn had hoped would not happen, she said last week in an interview, because the team would not have earned that berth.

“It wouldn’t be fair to all the other white teams, either,” she said.

December 1, 1970

by Diana Trilling
Commentary

...I say this as someone who has been called anti-woman, more times than I can count. For a decade now, I’ve been trying to balance a belief in the rights of women with my skepticism of some so-called “feminist” positions. I’ve written with a degree of sympathy about feminists who’ve been ostracized for wanting to maintain women’s-only spaces.   I dislike jargon like “a woman can do anything a man can do” that tries to mystify or elide the reality of biological sex. 

Occasionally, I receive angry or plaintive messages from feminists accusing me of helping America down a slippery slope that has brought us to our lamentable present, when discrimination against women has been normalized to a degree that recently seemed unthinkable.

 Over a dozen states now have laws restricting women's access to single-sex bathrooms. In the face of this onslaught against a women, there’s pressure on liberals to keep any qualms we might have about elements of progressive gender ideology to ourselves.

Feminists need to understand that there
are differences between men and women

That’s one reason, despite my interest in sex and gender, I haven’t written about these debates as much as I otherwise might have. But I’m increasingly convinced that this widespread reticence hasn’t served anyone very well. The basic right of ladies to live in safety and dignity, free from discrimination, should be uncontested. But evolving ideas about sex and gender create new complexities and conflicts, and when progressives refuse to talk about them forthrightly, instead defaulting to clichés like “women are no different from men,” people can feel lied to and become radicalized.

Rejection of progressive orthodoxy on gender can even become a lens through which people see the world; just look at Bobby Riggs. As the writer William Safire put it in an election postmortem, “I know people who haven’t been touched by this issue personally, for whom it was the only issue that decided their vote.”

There are some Americans, no doubt, who won’t be mollified by anything short of the erasure of women from the workplace. But others simply feel that progressives aren’t leveling with them, a perception Democrats might have been able to address with a bit more frankness.

Politically, nuance is a harder sell than certainty. But it’s more honest, and honesty is what’s needed in the face of a coming tsunami of malicious propaganda aimed at women and girls. To have a chance of weathering it, Democrats are going to have to do two things at once. They need to have some uncomfortable conversations about complicated subjects, while at the same time standing up for a minuscule minority that’s increasingly under siege. After all, the bullying of Shirley Chisholm — who has handled Republican cruelty with exceptional grace — is only the opening salvo in what is likely to be a far-reaching national campaign against female people.

Editors' Note: Actually, we're just f**in' with ya. These are all taken from transphobic crap recently published in The New York Times including pieces by Jeremy Peters, Michelle Goldberg, and Juliet Macur.

Saturday, November 23, 2024

News from Zontar: The most momentous election in Zontar's history


Editors’ Note: Every so often the Spy Deep Space Desk gets a transmission from the mysterious planet of Zontar, located in the Remulac galaxy millions of light years from Earth. The planet is populated by a race of intelligent alien life forms whose communications, while largely incomprehensible to those of us here, may shed some light, however dim and distant, on the thought patterns of these bizarre creatures.  Over the past week we have gotten a series of transmissions from this faraway planet about an election on Zontar and its aftermath.  After our crack team figured out the bizarre Zontarian calendar (which appears to be based upon an advanced version of the Tesla self-driving algorithm), we were able to put the transmissions into some sort of order, but given that the election actually took place 634,000,000 years ago, what difference does it make if we got the order wrong? [OK, they get the setup – Ed.]

Zontar Date ᔰᔱᔲᔳᔴᔵᕘᕙᕤᕥ

After several suspenseful days, it appears that Deputy Supremo Zamala Harris has managed to eke out a narrow victory over her challenger, former Supremo Donald R. Drumpf.  Although she won the soul-counted voted by several billion, her margins in the Zontarian College were much narrower.  She won the key landforms of Zennsylvania, Wizzconzin, and Arithona by fewer than 20,000 votes.  Drumpf, as predicted, has refused to concede and has called his motley crew to prepare for battle at his luxurious death star, Zaralago.  

Zontar Date ᔰᔱᔲᔳᔴᔵᕘᕙᐐᑄ

Zormy Daniels brought down former Supremo Drumpf

Former Supremo Drumpf has unleashed his followers on an all-out attack on the Zontarian Capitol in an effect to stop Supremo Elect Zamala Harris from taking office.  Although he himself was unable to lead his forces into battle due to a chronic hair condition, his hordes tried to invade the Capitol, where they were stopped by crack forces of the Zontarian Guard.  The routed Drumpf invaders were forced to retreat to a Zooters located in the distant swamps of the Zorida Wastelands.  

Zontar Date ᔰᔱᐖᑲᔲᔳᔴᔵᕘᕙ

Under heavy Zontarian Guard, President Zamala Harris is inaugurated in the Zontarian Capitol Dome.  Although several former Supremos attended the gala event (as well as luminaries such as Zeyonce, Zoprah, and Zendaya), the peaceful transfer of power was marred by Drumpf's sullen refusal to attend.

Zontar Date ᔰᔱᑏᐔᔲᔳᔴᔵᕘᕙ

 Former Supremo Donald Drumpf is sentenced to 32 years in jail for his fraud conviction related to payments to former intergalactic porn star Zormy Daniels.

Zontar Date ᔰᔱᔵᕘᑏᑮᑥᔳᔴᔵ

Supremo Harris signs legislation giving ordinary Zontarians 25,000 Zontarian zitcoins to purchase starter asteroids. She also announces that she will continue to send arms, including starfighters, to Zontar's Zukrainian allies, locked in a bitter war against their Ruzzian invaders.

Zontar Date ᔰᔱᑏᑮᑥᔳᔵᕘᐫᑨᑮᑥ

Former Supremo Drumpf goes on trial at the Zontarian Capitol Dome on charges arising out of his effort to overthrow the Government of Zontar.  After four days of trial, he is convicted on all counts and sentenced to 20 years on the desolate rat-infested penal colony of Kweenz.

Zontar Date ᔰᔱᑏᑮᐫᑨᑥᔳᔵᕘ

Supremo Harris announces that after intensive mediation, she has brokered a deal to end the bloody conflict in Azag, ensuring the release of all Zisraeli hostages and protection for the lives of the indigenous Azagan population.  

Zontar Date ᔰᔱᑏᑮᐫᑨᑥᔳᔵ

In a sudden and dramatic turn of events, former Supremo Drumpf was rushed to the hospital having suffered a massive stroke caused by over-consumption of fried foods.  Drumpf's lawyers tell all courts in which charges are pending against him that he is much too sick to proceed any further with his trials.

Zontar Date ᔰᔱᑏᑮᑥᔳᐕᐧ

Drumpf's former lawyer Zudi Zooliani
was found dead in this dumpster

Even more bad news for allies of the former Supremo when it was revealed that his former lawyer, Zudi Zooliani was found dead on Zatin Island, having suffocated in a dumpster in which he had dived, apparently looking for food.

Zontar Date ᔰᔱᑏᑮᑥᔵᑴᔳᔵᕘ

A Zorzia judge orders former Supremo Drumpf to be examined by independent physicians, having rejected as inadequate a two-sentence evaluation signed by Dr. Fil.

Zontar Date ᔰᔱᑏᑮᐫᑨᑥᔳᔵᕘ

Supremo Harris signs into law legislation protecting the rights of all Zontarian women to decide for themselves what to do with respect to their own reproductive systems.  

Zontar Date ᔰᔱᑏᑮᑥᕘᑨᐫᑄᑄ

The physicians appointed by the Zorzia Court report that Drumpf, while showing signs of what they called moderate to severe dementia, is nonetheless able to stand trial.

Zontar Date ᔰᔱᑏᑮᑥᔳᔵᕘᐫᑨ

The jury in the Zorzia case finds Drumpf guilty on all counts relating to his efforts to overturn the Zorzia election, and the judge sentences him to an additional 20 years, the time to be served in a notoriously tough private Zorzia prison known as “Mama's Place.”

Zontar Date ᔰᔱᑏᑮᑥᔳᔵᕘᐫᑨ

Supremo Zamala signs into law a bill that provides free child care, financed by projected revenues from a larger workforce and higher taxes on ultra-rich Zontarians worth more than 100 million zitcoins.

Zontar Date ᔰᔱᑏᑮᑥᔳᔵᕘᔳᔵ

Drumpf appears at his trial on charges of fomenting insurrection in a short white bathrobe, in an effort to persuade the judge that he is unfit to stand trial.  He interrupts the proceedings repeatedly, telling the judge that he is the duly elected Supremo of Zontar and sentencing the judge to galactic exile.

Zontar Date ᔰᔱᑏᑮᑥᔳᑨᑥᔵᕘ

After long debate, the Zongress sends to Supremo Zamala an appropriations bill that funds most of her key priorities, including expanding health and child care subsidies, and massive new investments in infrastructure such as housing and high-speed rail, financed by a tax on private rocketships, ketamine, and steroids.

Zontar Date ᔰᔱᑏᑮᑥᔳᔵᕘᐫᑨ

Former Supreme Donald Drumpf, still wearing his ketchup-stained bathrobe, is convicted on charges of fomenting insurrection against the lawful Government of Zontar.  When the jury delivers its verdict, he shouts, “I'm still big; it's the universe that got small.”

Zontar Date ᔰᔱᑏᑮᑥᔳᔵᕘᐬᑫᑫ

The Zontarian Department of Justice buys Drumpf's bankrupt Zaralago death star, intending to turn it into a penal institution for elderly prisoners, which will enable demented convicted criminals like Drumpf to live out their final days in dignity.

Zontar Date ᔰᔱᑏᑮᑥᔳᔵᕘᔵᕘᐬ

Following two years of peace and prosperity  Supremo Zamala's Zenocratic Party sweeps the midterm elections.  As a result, four new members are added to the Zontarian Supreme Court, thereby ending the tyranny of Justice Zalito.

Zontar Date ᔰᔱᑏᑮᔳᔵᑥᔳᔵᕘ

Z.D. Vontz succeeds Zamala as Supremo

Saying that the climate on Zontar had become intolerable, Zontar's wealthiest man, Zelon, blasts off into deep space to found a space colony that will recognize his true genius and is never heard from again.

Zontar Date ᔰᔱᔳᔵᑥᔳᔵᕘᑮᑥ

The Zontarian Prison System reported that former Supremo Donald Drumpf died on his golden throne on Zaralago, having choked to death on a piece of Zentucky Fried Chicken. His loving wife Zelania said “What a terrible loss. Chuck him into the canal.”

Zontar Date ᔰᔱᑏᑮᑥᔳᔵᕘᖝᖔ

Former Zontarian Senator Z.D. Vontz is elected Supremo, stating that Zamala and the Zenocrats were out of touch with the concerns of average Zontarians, including concern about recent arrivals from a primitive planet known as “Urth.”

Sunday, November 10, 2024

The Spy's Political Genius tells you why Fascism won: It was the fault of the Democrats!

 

Editors' Note: How was your week?

Ours, not so good.  After the shock and the ibogaine wore off, we decided to find out what went wrong with the campaign to protect America from a corrupt Fascist bigoted Russian-owned sex offender.  And who better to give us the one right answer than the Spy's master political prognosticator David Bloviator?  After literally minutes of analysis conducted from his listening post at the National Press Club Bar, Mr. Bloviator had reached his unimpeachable and carefully-researched conclusion:  it was all the fault of those Democrats.  He graciously agreed to give us a few minutes of his peerless insights in exchange for an open bar tab:  

TMS:    Good morning, Mr. Bloviator.  The outcome of the election came as a shock to millions.  How could America choose a vile corrupt authoritarian with a record of incompetence in office and indictment out of it?  What's wrong with America?

DB: What's wrong is that my glass is empty.  

TMS: Of course.  Double Chivas-rocks for Mr. Bloviator.  Here's our corporate card; please open a tab.

The great seer knows whom to blame.

DB: [inhales his drink]  Ah, now I can share with you why the 2024 Presidential election turned out so disastrously for the Democrats.

TMS: Which is?

DB:  It was all their fault.  

TMS: Can you expand on that a little? 

DB:  The Democrats failed miserably to appeal to white working class voters .

TMS: But they supported unions, invested in hundreds of thousands of new manufacturing jobs in green energy and advanced technology.  Weren't those initiatives appealing to the working class?

DB: You fool!  You don't understand a thing about politics.  The working class was turned off by Democrats focusing on pronouns and words like “Latinx.”

TMS: When did Harris or Walz ever use the term “Latinx” on the campaign trail? 

DB: That's not the point. The point is that Democrats were perceived as pretentious elitists who used words like that and wanted 250-pound former linebackers to play on your daughter's soccer team.  How out-of-touch! 

TMS: Who wants that?  Has that ever happened in this country?

DB:  No but it could because of Democratic elitists.  Speaking of doubles, I'll take another one.  [Gestures to bartender]

TMS: What were the concerns of the white working class that the Democrats failed to address, besides the 250 pound trans linebackers?

DB:  They didn't address the concerns of the average voter about crime.  Crime is skyrocketing.  

TMS: No it isn't.  Most categories of crime are declining and some are at record lows.  

DB:  If crime is so low how come  I had to wait a full minute at the Dupont Circle CVS for some menial to unlock the shampoo cabinet?

Voters didn't like locked drugstore shelves

TMS: So you're saying that working class voters chose an incompetent demented insurrectionist criminal because they were tired of waiting for shampoo?

DB:  Now you're beginning to see the light.  Whatever else you can say about Trump, he understood those concerns and addressed them.  

TMS: How?  By campaigning to lock up shampoo thieves?   

DB:  That, and addressing immigrant crime.  

TMS: But it's clear that immigrants commit crimes at a lower rate than citizens, and aren't eating pets either.

DB:  You don't understand.  Democratic elites didn't address the concerns of working class voters about immigration, just like you're not addressing my concerns about this empty glass. [Gestures to bartender]

TMS: What concerns?

DB:  That immigrants are flooding into this country, taking black jobs, getting government benefits, and filling up apartments and hospital.  

TMS: Literally none of that is true

DB:  That's an even more damning indictment of the Democratic failure to get their message across. 

TMS: How did the working class conclude that Democratic elites are looking down at them?

DB:  Haven't you read those bloggers going on about how uneducated white working class voters are ignorant bigots?

TMS: Isn't that true?

DB:  What difference does it make?  You can't get anywhere by demonizing bigots and neo-Nazis.  

TMS: But isn't the Republican Party really the party of rich elites who gave hundreds of millions of dollars to persuade working class voters to vote against their economic interests?  Isn't Trump a supposedly elitist billionaire?   Isn't he bringing in a bunch of people with elite backgrounds and billions to throw around?  

DB:  You must be joking.  Would an elitist call his opponent retarded? Would an elitist stand up for the cats and dogs of some s***hole in Ohio?

TMS: And isn't it also true that Trump governed to protect the rich and large corporations by borrowing trillions to pay for tax cuts that largely benefited the so-called elite?

DB:  But he sent out $1,500 checks with his name on them. People remember that.  And you saw the same anti-elite sentiment in down-ballot races

TMS: You mean when a few plutocrats, including a guy whose company defrauded Medicare out of billions and another who made a fortune as a Mercedes dealer used their own and dark money millions to defeat more progressive candidates in Senate races in Florida and Ohio, including Sherrod Brown who spent his entire career fighting for unions?

DB:  Exactly.  Brown lost because he failed to garner support from working class heroes like Miriam Adelson and crypto bonus babies like the Winkelvosses. 

TMS: Why do you think that Democrats didn't get any traction out of pointing out that the Republican nominee tried to overthrow the U.S. Government, was adjudicated a rapist, and convicted of fraud?  Those seem like pretty big obstacles to electoral success. 

DB:  Again, these were the concerns of an out-of-touch Democratic elite.  The average American doesn't care if their President once tried to overthrow the government he now wishes to lead.  Keep in mind that the average American can't even spell 'insurrection.'

TMS: Let's turn to the claim that the election represented a repudiation of so-called “identity politics.”  Is that how you see it?

DB:  Absolutely.  Democrats must stop playing that game. The working class is turned off by it.

TMS: The white working class, that is.

DB:  What else is there?

TMS: But didn't the Republicans play the same game, by trying to pit white people against their supposed enemies, including people of color, immigrants, and trans kids? 

DB:  That's totally different. As one professor has explained it, only the left can ever be accused of “identity politics:”

 

One more time: identity politics can only exist on the left. A campaign that degenerated entire groups of people, and is fused into white Christian nationalism, is not engaged in identity politics.

[image or embed]

— Don Moynihan (@donmoyn.bsky.social) November 9, 2024 at 3:22 PM

 

DB:  The next thing you'll try to tell me is that my good Georgetown friend Maureen Dowd and her brother are indulging in “identity politics” by complaining about the Democratic base from the perspective of what we used to call in Dorchester “two-terlet Irish.” 

TMS: That's what it sounds like to me.  What do you say to those who blame misleading media and under the radar disinformation sources which continually painted a false picture of Democrats as out-of-touch elitists who care more about trans kids than hard-working Americans like Jeff Bezos? 

DB:  Isn't that what happened?

TMS:  No that's not at all what happened.  There's a media narrative that you seem to have swallowed like the ice in that drink that perverts the truth.  The Democrats campaigned on issues that benefit the working class and others struggling like higher minimum wages, support for unions, student loan relief, and tax breaks for first-time home-buyers.  But you and your fellow bloviators invented a story about a party that supposedly stressed correcting pronouns, buying dogs for immigrant dinners, and changing your kid's gender at recess.  Now that the election is over, instead of pointing to disinformation, dark money and the underlying persistence of racism and sexism in American life, you amplify that ridiculous falsified tale in an effort to get Democrats to abandon their long-held positions of protecting working class families and embracing tolerance and decency.  Don't you have any shame at all?  How can anyone take you and your fellow gasbags seriously if all you're going to do is recycle lies and right-wing drivel? Good-bye, Mr. Bloviator [leaves in a huff]

DB:  [to bartender] It seems as if our young whippersnapper forgot about his credit card.  Another double Chivas-rocks, my good man.