A Spy exclusive: Belichick's thrilling D-Day narration

"Good battle.  Special teams really added a lot."

By Roscoe Arbuckle
Entertainment Correspondent

Lots of media sources have reported that Bill Belichick has inked a deal to narrate a new documentary on that obscure corner of history known as D-Day.  But only the Spy has actually got its mitts on the shooting script!  Spoiler alert: it's as thrilling as you might expect!  Judge for yourself:

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D-DAY: OVER NORMANDY

FINAL SCRIPT 3/17/17

F/X: Guns shooting, planes swooping, bombs falling

NARRATOR

It was the most decisive battle in history.  We asked genius football coach Bill Belichick to tell you all about the thrilling story of D-Day.

BELICHICK

Allied invasion.  Great team.  Everyone did their job.  Good offense.  Army did great.  Navy did great.  Air power was good.  That's it.

NARRATOR

That's it?  Tell us about the German defenders.

BELICHICK

Great defense.  Good plan.  Lots of talent there.  We had to take them seriously.

NARRATOR

But D-Day was only the beginning.  The Allied Armies rolled all the way to Berlin.

BELICHICK

Berlin's a long way off.  Thinking about Normandy.  Take it a week at a time.

NARRATOR 

The most decisive battle in history and that's all you've got to say about it?

BELICHICK

Yeah.  That's pretty much it. 

F/X: 89 more minutes of guns shooting, planes swooping, and bombs falling

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