Editors' Note: We had planned to bring you today the latest insights from the Spy's peerless political prognosticator David Bloviator, who shares his matchless wisdom with you, the simple reader, from his listening post at the National Press Club bar. However, after a very long night of listening from said perch, Mr. Bloviator is sadly too tired to be interviewed today. In his place, we waded into our 254-year archive to find a dispatch from our former Berlin correspondent, David Trombonick, about another consequential election. Enjoy this little slice of ancient history!
HOT OFF THE GERMAN CAMPAIGN TRAIL
David Trombonick on
WHITHER GERMANY?
From Berlin Bureau Chief David Trombonick
By Cable to The Massachusetts Spy
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| Our man in Germany |
BERLIN, Germany – From his listening post at the bar of the Ausländer Press Verein on the Wilhelmstrasse, the Spy's Berlin correspondent David Trombonick keeps his fingers on the glass [Surely, the pulse? – Ed.] of the endlessly fascinating and colorful world of German politics. Today, to explain the complexities of the political situation in Germany to you, the simple reader, he has graciously consented to be interviewed.
TMS: Mr. Trombonick, what do you see as the key issues facing Germany today?
DT: The key issue is that my glass is empty. How can that be in the only bar in Berlin where you can get Chivas Regal?
TMS: Herr Ober, bitte!
DT: [drains glass] That's better. Now what did you want to know, you young whippersnapper?
TMS: What should Americans know about German politics today?
DT: Germany is a vibrant, stable democracy. But it is afflicted with a level of polarization that can only be described as “tribal.” Germans are sorting themselves out into opposing factions, each of which generates what I can only describe as a cult-like following. As my good friend Guido Enderis of The New York Times wrote on July 9, “each party is incapable of putting the national viewpoint above partisan considerations. This includes the government now in office, which holds no mandate from the people and was installed over the head of a divided and irresolute Reichstag.”
TMS: Who are these sides?
DT: On the left we have the Social Democrats and the Communists. This Red menace threatens Germany with extremist positions like deficit spending.
TMS: And on the other?
DT: On the right we have a vibrant populist party called the National Socialists, which appeals to disaffected and economically anxious Germans.
TMS: You mean the Nazis?
DT: Yes, if you want to call them that.
TMS: Isn't that what they call themselves?
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| The Nazis are moving to the center |
DT: That's not the point. The point is that we need to understand the basis of the Nazi, um, National Socialist appeal to the electorate. As Dr. Goebbels himself said, “Hitler knocks at the gate leading to complete power, and in his first are united the fists of millions of workers and peasants.” That's the power of populism!
TMS: Why are those workers and peasants so upset?
DT: The average German is struggling due to the economic depression. You can't walk out of this club without being accosted by filthy homeless tramps demanding a few pfennig for food or something.
TMS: They look like they're starving.
DT: Whatever. The point is that many Germans have lost hope, and are receptive to the powerful message of a charismatic leader with a strong economic message.
TMS: You mean Herr Hitler?
DT: Yes. He is increasingly regarded by Germans as their last hope.
TMS: Aren't you worried that if Herr Hitler is made Chancellor he will rule as a dictator and destroy German democracy?
DT: I speak to many highly placed German businessmen, industrialists, and generals. They assure me that you do not need to take Herr Hitler literally.
TMS: What accounts for Herr Hitler's appeal? He seems like an angry incoherent clown to me.
DT: In many ways his rise is due to the failure of German liberals to take seriously the legitimate concerns of ordinary Germans.
TMS: Like what?
DT: Many Germans are still angry about the Versailles Treaty, which held Germany responsible for starting the World War.
TMS: Didn't they?
DT: That's not the point. The point is that the politics of grievance continue to play a role in German politics.
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| German tourists enjoying a rowdy night in Berlin |
TMS: Speaking of grievance, let's talk about the elephant in the room.
DT: If you're speaking of my empty glass, let's. Herr Ober!
TMS: Actually, I was speaking of the anti-Semitic views of the Nazis and Hitler.
DT: That is certainly to be deplored, but you have to remember that Germans are used to Herr Hitler's alternately reckless and incoherent big mouth.
TMS: But he has spewed out the most vile and ridiculous lies about Jews since he wrote his memoir.
DT: That's why they're used to it.
TMS: How can you get used to statements like throw the Jews out or dirty Jews, which are standard Nazi talking points?
DT: I have been assured by respectable and influential Germans that such statements are nothing more than beer-hall talk and can be disregarded.
TMS: What about the many reliable reports of Nazi brown shirts beating Jews in the streets and breaking windows of Jewish-owned businesses?
DT: You have to remember that many of these brown shirts are small-town boys and it may be their first trip to the bright lights of Berlin. They are really nothing more than excited tourists.
TMS: So the violent riots and beatings in the streets of Berlin are nothing to worry about?
DT: Every city has its bad days. Do you think there's no crime in New York?
TMS: Let's talk about what you expect to happen after the elections.
DT: Informed circles in Berlin believe that while Herr Hitler may get an inconsequential position in a future Cabinet, Hindenburg will never make him Chancellor. In response, Hitler will be compelled to moderate his conduct if he wants to play a part in any future German government. Sources close to him tell me that you can already see signs that he is maturing and becoming more policy-focused. That is why you see signs of moderation in the Nazi leader. Look at his speech in Tilsit, where he said his platform was based on “honor, liberty and bread.”
TMS: While his thugs were beating Jewish students at the Berlin University.
DT: There are violent elements on both sides, not just the Nazis.
TMS: Really? Where in Germany are Jews beating Nazis?
DT: I was referring to the Communists, among whose member there are regrettably many Jews. That is why in our focus group of 12 moderate Germans, many said that the Jews are the authors of their own misfortune.
TMS: That seems pretty cold.
DT: I have been assured by sources close to the great Jewish banking families of Germany that loyal patriotic German Jews have nothing to worry about.
TMS: Thank you, Mr. Trombonick.
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